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Travis Beats Godzilla

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Step aside Batman and Superman. Now we're going to tell you the story that will litterally blow your mind! 
Flying high in the clouds, there was a man named Travis. He was the worlds first pizza gobbler. He gobbled all the pizzas at Little Ceasers one day, that he was able to construct his very own glider. 
Soaring through the air on his salami dice, as he would like to call it, he spotted something out of the ordinary. A giant Godzilla hoodstomping a Kmart. No more blue light speacials baby.